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Santa should totally publish the naughty list. What a great way to meet people.

$13.00

I hate it when I mean to buy seedless grapes but instead I accidentally get... well you know... oreos.

$13.00

Wake up. Kick ass. Repeat. 100 sheet sticky note pad

$4.95

my face is in this bag zipper pouch

$11.00

I'm stuck somewhere between: "I need to save money" and "You only live once" list pad

$6.50

Adulthood is saying, "After this week, things will slow down a bit." over and over again until you die list pad

$6.50

When I saw you drinking wine, I knew we would be friends.

$13.00

do mimosas count as a juice cleanse?

$13.00

Groceries & shit wine list pad

$6.50

I'm just sayin' if there was a cash bar at back to school night, there'd be no reason to have fundraisers the rest of the year - Cocktail Napkins

$5.50

ME: *Getting off the couch* I'll be right back. MY DOG: I'd really feel more comfortable if we went together.

$13.00

Me: Our kids are finally at an age where we can sleep in on the weekends. Youth Sports: Let me just stop you right there.

$13.00

If they started putting box tops on wine, we could rebuild the entire school cocktail napkins

$5.50

I wouldn't do anything for a Klondike Bar, but I'd do some pretty sketchy stuff for tacos Swedish dishcloth

$7.90

I wanted a puppy. My husband didn't want a puppy so we compromised, and I got a puppy.

$13.00

How many fun size candy bars make up a full size? Is it 17? I think it's 17. 100 sheet sticky note pad

$4.95

I love it when my pet sighs. It's like, what ails you my furry little freeloader?

$13.00

I don't want to rock and roll all night anymore, an hour is fine, two tops cocktail napkins

$5.50

Yesterday I quit drinking but tonight we celebrate my comeback kitchen tea towel

$13.00

She believed she could and she almost did, but then someone asked her repeatedly for a snack until she forgot what she was doing, so she didn't.

$13.00

Self discipline is tough because I'm the boss of me and that lady runs a real loose ship 100 sheet sticky note pad

$4.95

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.But if the white runs out, I'l drink the red Cocktail Napkins

$5.50

Friend: I like your lipgloss. Me: Thanks, it's bacon grease. 100 sheet sticky note pad

$4.95

I don't want to rock and roll all night anymore. An hour is fine. Two tops. 100 sheet sticky note pad

$4.95

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