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Part of me says, "I should stop drinking like this." But the other part of me says, "Don't listen to her, she's drunk." Cocktail Napkins
Part of me says, "I should stop drinking like this." But the other part of me says, "Don't listen to her, she's drunk." Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
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I hate it when people ask me what I like to do for fun, because there's no classy way to say, "Day Drink."
I hate it when people ask me what I like to do for fun, because there's no classy way to say, "Day Drink."
$5.50
Does anyone know which page of the bible explains how to turn water into wine? Asking for a friend. Cocktail Napkins
Does anyone know which page of the bible explains how to turn water into wine? Asking for a friend. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
Not only do I dance like nobody is watching but I also drink as if I don't have to work in the morning. Cocktail Napkins
Not only do I dance like nobody is watching but I also drink as if I don't have to work in the morning. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
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This one time, I called the cops on my own party because I was ready to go to bed Cocktail napkins
This one time, I called the cops on my own party because I was ready to go to bed Cocktail napkins
$5.50
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If you ask me if I want a drink and I say, "No", please ask me again. I was just shy the first time.
If you ask me if I want a drink and I say, "No", please ask me again. I was just shy the first time.
$5.50
When I saw you drinking wine I knew we would be friends. Cocktail Napkins
When I saw you drinking wine I knew we would be friends. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
My body asked for water, but I gave it wine instead, because nobody tells me what to do. Cocktail Napkins
My body asked for water, but I gave it wine instead, because nobody tells me what to do. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
Mimosas are nothing but trouble. One minute you're eating breakfast, and the next you're sending, "You up?" texts at 2:30 in the afternoon. Cocktail Napkins
Mimosas are nothing but trouble. One minute you're eating breakfast, and the next you're sending, "You up?" texts at 2:30 in the afternoon. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
Some women like to be wined and dined. I like to be margarita'd and queso'd. Cocktail Napkins
Some women like to be wined and dined. I like to be margarita'd and queso'd. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
Yesterday I quit drinking, but tonight we celebrate my comeback Cocktail Napkins
Yesterday I quit drinking, but tonight we celebrate my comeback Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
Ma'am you can't bring outside drinks in here. Me: This is a service mimosa. Cocktail Napkins
Ma'am you can't bring outside drinks in here. Me: This is a service mimosa. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
Nothing says middle aged like sending a text after a ladies night out that says Here's the soup recipe I was telling you about cocktail napkins
Nothing says middle aged like sending a text after a ladies night out that says Here's the soup recipe I was telling you about cocktail napkins
$5.50
My husband just said, "calm down" like he wants his own dateline special cocktail napkins
My husband just said, "calm down" like he wants his own dateline special cocktail napkins
$5.50
If they started putting box tops on wine, we could rebuild the entire school cocktail napkins
If they started putting box tops on wine, we could rebuild the entire school cocktail napkins
$5.50
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.But if the white runs out, I'l drink the red Cocktail Napkins
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.But if the white runs out, I'l drink the red Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
I don't want to rock and roll all night anymore, an hour is fine, two tops cocktail napkins
I don't want to rock and roll all night anymore, an hour is fine, two tops cocktail napkins
$5.50
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I'm just sayin' if there was a cash bar at back to school night, there'd be no reason to have fundraisers the rest of the year - Cocktail Napkins
I'm just sayin' if there was a cash bar at back to school night, there'd be no reason to have fundraisers the rest of the year - Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
Grandma said in her day, she did 3 times the work you do. Me: Well, in grandma's day, there was cocaine in the soda. Cocktail Napkins
Grandma said in her day, she did 3 times the work you do. Me: Well, in grandma's day, there was cocaine in the soda. Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
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I'd like to thank whoever invented starters and pre-drinking, eating before eating and drinking before drinking is absolute genius - Cocktail Napkins
I'd like to thank whoever invented starters and pre-drinking, eating before eating and drinking before drinking is absolute genius - Cocktail Napkins
$5.50
After I say "That's crazy" twice, please wrap up your story.
After I say "That's crazy" twice, please wrap up your story.
$5.50
I hate it when people are around me when I'm trying to parallel park. It's like, "Can I get some privacy here?" cocktail napkins
I hate it when people are around me when I'm trying to parallel park. It's like, "Can I get some privacy here?" cocktail napkins
$5.50
This bottle of wine tastes like all the presents are going in gift bags this year cocktail napkins
This bottle of wine tastes like all the presents are going in gift bags this year cocktail napkins
$5.50
New in
I said I wasn't going to drink today, But then I went for a walk and saw a woman drinking a glass of wine through her living room window and thought, well if she's having one - Cocktail Napkins
I said I wasn't going to drink today, But then I went for a walk and saw a woman drinking a glass of wine through her living room window and thought, well if she's having one - Cocktail Napkins
$5.50