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The Holidays... That time of the year when I cook all day and then my kids eat nothing but the rolls.
The Holidays... That time of the year when I cook all day and then my kids eat nothing but the rolls.
$13.00
Some women like to be wined and dined. I like to be margarita'd and queso'd.
Some women like to be wined and dined. I like to be margarita'd and queso'd.
$13.00
Security Guard: Ma'am, you can't bring outside drinks in here. Me: This is a service mimosa.
Security Guard: Ma'am, you can't bring outside drinks in here. Me: This is a service mimosa.
$13.00
As soon as you say, "My child would never," here they come nevering like they never nevered before.
As soon as you say, "My child would never," here they come nevering like they never nevered before.
$13.00
Me: Our kids are finally at an age where we can sleep in on the weekends. Youth Sports: Let me just stop you right there.
Me: Our kids are finally at an age where we can sleep in on the weekends. Youth Sports: Let me just stop you right there.
$13.00
She believed she could and she almost did, but then someone asked her repeatedly for a snack until she forgot what she was doing, so she didn't.
She believed she could and she almost did, but then someone asked her repeatedly for a snack until she forgot what she was doing, so she didn't.
$13.00
The most important thing I've learned in life, and I can't stress this enough: You have to make salad in a bigger bowl than you think.
The most important thing I've learned in life, and I can't stress this enough: You have to make salad in a bigger bowl than you think.
$13.00
I need two bank accounts. One for sober, responsible me that pays the bills
I need two bank accounts. One for sober, responsible me that pays the bills
$13.00
I hate it when I say I want to lose… funny kitchen tea towel
I hate it when I say I want to lose… funny kitchen tea towel
$13.00
I just grabbed the milk from the fridge and I'm pretty sure I heard the wine say, "what the hell?"
I just grabbed the milk from the fridge and I'm pretty sure I heard the wine say, "what the hell?"
$13.00
I love bacon because you can wrap it around everything. It's basically the duct tape of food.
I love bacon because you can wrap it around everything. It's basically the duct tape of food.
$13.00
Don't ever let a recipe tell you how many chocolate chips to use. You measure that shit with your heart.
Don't ever let a recipe tell you how many chocolate chips to use. You measure that shit with your heart.
$13.00
Does anyone know which page of the Bible explains how to turn water into wine? Asking for a friend.
Does anyone know which page of the Bible explains how to turn water into wine? Asking for a friend.
$13.00
stove for display only
stove for display only
$13.00
Don't let them treat you like free chips and salsa. You're guac baby, guac
Don't let them treat you like free chips and salsa. You're guac baby, guac
$13.00
I wish I could be the person I thought I could be when I bought all this produce
I wish I could be the person I thought I could be when I bought all this produce
$13.00
I wanted a puppy. My husband didn't want a puppy so we compromised, and I got a puppy.
I wanted a puppy. My husband didn't want a puppy so we compromised, and I got a puppy.
$13.00
A good thing to do in the morning is not talk to me
A good thing to do in the morning is not talk to me
$13.00
According to this box of mac and cheese, I'm a family of four
According to this box of mac and cheese, I'm a family of four
$13.00
All the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names
All the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names
$13.00
All you need is love. And a dog. Ok, and maybe a beer.
All you need is love. And a dog. Ok, and maybe a beer.
$13.00
Are tortillas flushable? Asking for a friend.
Are tortillas flushable? Asking for a friend.
$13.00
are we having drinks or dranks? i need to dress accordingly
are we having drinks or dranks? i need to dress accordingly
$13.00
Aww, snap.
Aww, snap.
$13.00